BY: CHARLIE
Dear Charlie is an advice column that allows readers to ask Charlie for guidance on how to deal with problems. Whether it’s about love, friendships, or frustrations, Charlie is here to give you tips and ideas for tackling life’s everyday challenges. Readers can ask Charlie for advice through DM via our Instagram @liubknews, or anonymously through this form.
Hi there! Charlie here with another quick discussion on a serious topic: mental health. Given that September was National Suicide Prevention Month, I thought it was no better time than now to explore some of the ways you can seek help if you are or if you know someone who may be struggling mentally.
First things first: you are not weak for admitting that you need help.
Whether you’re struggling with depressive symptoms that make it difficult to get out of bed or get work done, or dealing with intense panic attacks or PTSD symptoms, that’s okay. Dealing with these things does not make you any less than other people.
Quite frankly, I would say that still waking up each day and attempting to put effort into your daily tasks despite the inner turmoil makes you a very strong person.
Similarly, you might be comparing yourself to other people in that you see other people who seem to be coping with stress better or accomplishing more than you and decide that they are stronger or better than you. However, that is a one-sided perspective, because you can never truly know what someone else is struggling with.
So, what do you do when you are struggling?
You can reach out to a friend, a family member, or someone you know.
Reaching out to someone when you’re feeling down could be the last thing you’d want to do. But talking with someone you’re familiar with can help you feel like your old self again.
Oftentimes when these sorts of crises happen, we feel alone and alienated from everyone around us. Telling a friend something as simple as “Hey, I’ve been sadder than usual lately” does a few things. It lets your friend know how you are really feeling, so that they can help you and so they don’t take things personally when you hang out less often for instance.
Call an Anonymous Hotline
Sometimes telling a stranger how you’re really feeling is a bit easier than telling someone you know. After all, when you call a hotline, the person at the other end of the line has no idea what you look like, or any idea of who you are other than what you reveal. And when you call, you are never forced to disclose any details you don’t feel comfortable sharing.
Having a person to listen and validate your feelings can make a world of difference. They can also help connect you with other resources such as therapists or psychiatrists. A lot of hotlines even have a texting or live chat option.
Below are some resources you may find helpful:
National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline - 988
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration - 1-800-662-4357
National Crisis Text Line - text HELP to 741-741
National Sexual Assault Hotline - 1-800-656-4673
Veterans Crisis Line - 988, then dial 1
National Domestic Violence Hotline - 1-800-799-7233
Find out if Your Job Has an Employee Assistance Program
Some jobs may offer a free Employee Assistance Program (EAP). This is a program that offers mental health referrals, short-term counseling, and seminars on caring for one’s mental health and the like.
An EAP can be useful since once you reach out to them, the hard work of finding a therapist provider is greatly reduced. While EAP may only offer a limited number of free sessions (usually between 3-6), it could be a good way to get a headstart while you seek long-term therapy. The plus about utilizing your job’s EAP is that no one in the office has to know. Reaching out usually involves asking the HR department for the number or website of the provider that runs the program, but other than that, any communication is done directly between you and the provider. Your employer won’t need to know any of your personal issues and neither will your fellow coworkers.
And lastly, if you are in school, seek out your school’s psych services
If still in college, your tuition automatically covers access to your school's psychological services, where you can access therapy and other referrals. The therapy sessions can be ongoing as long as you remain a student at the school, and are typically conducted by current Ph.D. students studying psychology or similar fields. This can be a great and easily accessible way to get someone to talk to about coping methods, to vent to, and to work through challenging life events.
Hopefully, if you or someone you know happens to be struggling with any mental issue or life crisis, you can return to this page to see what some of your options are.
Best wishes and until next time!